open post

[polemical]

open post.
you know the drill.

Comments

[pinch_hitter]

Christ Munson if you were gonna help this whole time couldn't you have just said that from the start instead of being impossible? Alright like. How big a piece of wood do I need? Stupid question, bat-sized. I can do that.

[polemical]

why the hell would i have done that?

just be careful you don't pick up a piece of wood someone was gonna use for a construction project, now.

[pinch_hitter]

I was literally going to chop a branch off a tree. Do people mark the branches they're gonna use?

[polemical]

no, you should be fine. i just didn't want you selecting a 4x6 that you found leaning against a wall somewhere. tommy miller would have your hide for that shit.

[pinch_hitter]

I'm not an idiot I wouldn't have done that.

[No taking random boards, check. And Tommy scares the hell outta him, just for the record.]

So where's your lathe?

[polemical]

[ That's up for debate. ]

just wanted to make sure.

in my woodshop, of course. where else would i keep a lathe?

[ She's going to have to go bother Joel to get him to show her what the fuck to do so she doesn't embarrass herself if this stupid joke — she's pretty sure it's just a joke, but who knows? — goes any further. ]

[pinch_hitter]

How did you even get a woodshop? Probably cos you're friends with Joel and how did THAT even happen anyway?

[polemical]

why ask me a question if you're just going to answer it in the next breath?

[ So she doesn't have to answer, perfect. ]

because of my winning personality, obviously.

[pinch_hitter]

HAHA yeah right no really

[polemical]

go fuck yourself, harrington, i am a DELIGHT.

[pinch_hitter]

Joel is possibly the coolest guy in this entire town and you're telling me that he hangs out with you because you're a delight.

[polemical]

hahaha i'm gonna tell him you said that. you think joel miller is COOL? okay.

[ Like she doesn't hang on every word that comes out of that man's mouth. Look. It's different, okay, shut up. ]

and yes. that's exactly what i'm telling you.

[pinch_hitter]

What do I care? I don't care. Yeah I think he's cool but obviously you're a knock on his record.

[polemical]

okay that's great to know. i will definitely tell him. i'll tell him you said that, too.

[pinch_hitter]

Munson

Munson listen don't actually tell him that. Obviously why would you do that. You don't need to do that.

[polemical]

not so cool and collected when i'm calling your bluff, are you?

[pinch_hitter]

You know

You're a mean person. A very mean person.

[polemical]

you're just sensitive because you're sheltered and grew up without having to share your bed with a raccoon like the rest of us.

[pinch_hitter]

Holy shit did you have to share your bed with a raccoon?

People didn't have to do that. You're lying.

But if you're not that would be awful they're like really aggressive.

[polemical]

you're also really gullible, aren't you.

no. i never slept beside a raccoon.

some did get in our kitchen once but we convinced them to leave.

[ Wayne chased them out and refused to let Eddie adopt one before he boarded up the hole they crawled in through. ]

[pinch_hitter]

you know what forget it. I'll find someone on my own to help me with my munitions.

[polemical]

first it was the phallic imagery of the baseball bat, now you're talking about munitions??

did you break your hand or something?

[pinch_hitter]

WHY ARE YOU SPEAKING IN TONGUES

[polemical]

i'm making another dick joke, don't mind me.

[ Is it tempting to make fun of Steve? Of course it is. And she's not good at resisting temptation. But despite what he says, she's not actually mean, and Steve's still new in town and he's had a rough go of it lately.

She's been recuperating in warmth and safety for months. She can afford to be kind. Ish. ]

i can't help with bullets and shit, you gotta talk to maria miller about getting on patrol duty and they'll make you pass a test first, but the baseball bat i can probably swing. metaphorically. i've never swung an actual bat in my life.

[ Random pieces of wood or pipe? Yes. An actual baseball bat? No. ]

[pinch_hitter]

Thanks for clarifying nothing but your own sick mind, Munson.

Munitions isn't just bullets. It's like... equipment and stuff. Weapons. Storage.

You'll have to do more than metaphorically swing it. It's gotta be weighted and shit. You think Byers and I got here by luck? No. It was a baseball bat.