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[polemical]

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you know the drill.

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[polemical]

Oh no, does your mom make you help wash the robes when it's her turn or something?

[ The Cunninghams are rich enough that she's certain they have both a washing machine and a dryer, and pretty decent quality ones, too. That doesn't make doing laundry any easier, though, or at least that's what she's been told. The trailer just has a washing machine under the kitchen counter, and that thing is both tiny and ancient. Sometimes she just bites the bullet and hauls all her shit to the laundromat downtown, since then she can do it all at once.

And then she also doesn't have to hang her underwear and bras on a line out back. ]

[ccunningham]

[He shakes his head] No, god no, it's a cleaning service that does it, they do the altar cloths and stuff too but that's less often, those have to be done a specific way, kind of like showing the proper respect to the flag? So they usually throw in robe cleaning at a discount.

[As a point of fact they do have both a washer and a dryer, and more than that: Chris actually knows how to use them, and not in a 'just dump everything in and wash it on hot' way.]

[polemical]

[ Eddie's eyes are bright and interested as Chris explains the minutiae of altar cloth cleaning, an aspect of church life she had never considered. It makes sense, she supposes, that there's a ritual for that, too, since church seems to be made up entirely of rituals. ]

Do they, like, say a prayer over the washing machine before they put everything in? [ She sounds honestly curious, not like she's making fun of the idea. Well. She does sound a little amused, she can't hide that, but it's not coming from a place of malice. ] They don't have to do it all by hand, do they?

[ccunningham]

You know, I don't actually know? [His brow furrows, it seems like the kind of thing he should know, but it's just never come up. He knows what company does it and that's all he's needed to know] I think it's more like dry cleaning, though, at least for the linens, the choir robes are the finest polyester and can hit the spin cycle no problem.

[polemical]

[ She waves a dismissive hand. If Chris doesn't know, then it's clearly not all that important.

Grinning at him, she reaches out to tweak the front of his shirt. Cotton. ] You saying you're too good to wear some good ol' plastic robes, Chrissy?

[ccunningham]

[He does laugh again, shaking his head] My objection to choir robes has nothing to do with the fiber content Dee.

[It's more that he never really had the chance -or the choice- not to, and he's only learned in high school that that's kind of weird.]

[polemical]

[ She hums knowingly, nodding slowly and letting her eyes narrow theatrically. ] Right, right. It's because they're tacky. I remember now.

I have some bad news for you, sunshine. I love that shit. The tackier, the better. You keep hanging out with me, you're gonna be subjected to a lot of it.

[ccunningham]

[He shakes his head] Hey now, I just said they'd be tacky if they had our names embroidered on them. It's just... [He shrugs] It was never really my idea? Like, I probably thought it was, back in the beginning, but it really wasn't, and fat chance trying to get out of it now without getting disowned, or worse.

[polemical]

[ Despite how much Eddie loves to ham shit up, she lets her smile mellow a little, her expression smoothing out into something a little bit more serious so Chris knows she isn't laughing at him. ] Going to church, or being in the choir?

[ccunningham]

[Generally he knows when she's laughing about the situation or at him not knowing something, but he appreciates the shift in tone even if he doesn't fully realize it.] Both, I guess?

[He shakes his head] Been going to church since I was an infant, though so not like I really had a chance on that one, choir was different.

[polemical]

Well. [ Eddie can't really say anything about church, since she doesn't attend one and only sporadically did when she was much, much younger, but she gets how some parents steamroll their kids. And how little said kids can do about it, sometimes.

Personally, she thinks Chris should tell his mom to back off already, but that's really none of her business. ]

You'll be going to college soon. You won't have to sing ever again if you don't want to.

[ccunningham]

That's the plan. [He nods, and Eddie's not wrong in that thought, he just doesn't want to get disowned is all.] And I don't mind singing, I just don't know if I'm actually good at it outside of choir, since I'm not some rising star there, either.

[polemical]

[ Shifting, she pushes herself up on one hand so she can look into his face a little better, her eyes narrowing for a moment before she lets herself grin again and bounces off the bed. ]

Gimme a band. [ She drops to her knees in front of a banker's box, fishing through its contents. ] C'mon, sunshine, name a band. Any band.

[ccunningham]

[He laughs, shaking his head] Dee, I literally just said I know the Beatles, mom's gospel albums and Bob Dylan because mom thought he was going to corrupt us all. I mean, I think Prince is a name I've heard? Wouldn't be able to tell you any songs though.

[polemical]

[ At first, it seems like maybe she isn't even listening, nearly elbows-deep in the box of cassettes in front of her, but then she straightens like she's been hit by lightning. ]

Shut up, oh my god, I just found something. [ Twisting to look at him over her shoulder, she clutches a cassette to her chest, the only detail visible of the front being something yellow and something black peeking between her fingers. ] I can't believe I forgot about this, oh my god.

[ Scrambling to her feet somewhat inelegantly, she careens over to her boombox, ejecting the cassette already in it and instead slamming in the one in her hands. ] You're gonna love this, holy shit.

[ She hits play with a flourish, all but wiggling as the music starts with what sounds like either a low gong or some kind of church-y chord on an organ, atmospheric strings and echoing laughter lending the entire thing a vaguely eerie air. That part doesn't last long, maybe a minute, and then there's a beat of silence and guitars start to play. Loudly. ]

Okay, okay, okay. [ Crawling back over to him, she pushes and shoves at his knees until he moves up her bed a little so she can get back up on it beside him, and by the time the singer belts out Don't speak of the Devil, He's no friend of mine, she's back to grinning at him from a little too close. ] This is right up your alley, baby. Jesus music!

[ As if to underscore her point, the chorus comes screaming in, the whole band singing To Hell with the Devil, in unison while the drums pound beneath them. ]

[ccunningham]

[He does, in fact, shut up, and not just because she asked, but because she's clearly excited about something and he's curious to find out where this is going.

The way that barely-contained excitement causes her to ping-pong around the room is just another endearing facet of knowing her and his smile has probably gone just a little dopey over it by the time she wedges herself back in beside him.] Okay?

[He just blinks in blank disbelief for a moment, but there's an actual melody he can follow, and even though they're belting, they aren't just screaming so he can actually understand the lyrics, and that blank disbelief transforms into delighted disbelief with a bright laugh] Wait, is this for real?

[polemical]

[ Jackpot.

The fact that Chris laughs in delight like that has her laughing too, leaning in close to jostle him with her elbow even as she cracks open the cassette case to fish out the J-card so she can unfold it and show him the lyrics. ]

Hell yeah it's for real! Check it out.

[ Truth be told, Eddie doesn't really like Stryper. She finds their sound a little pedestrian, a little mainstream, and the lyrics leave a lot to be desired. But, if she had to pick a band to ease a good-natured church boy into her scene, she'd certainly have a hard time finding a better option. She's pretty sure his mom would still have a coronary if she caught Chris listening to this, no matter what the lyrics said, but his mom doesn't have to know.

When the guitar solo comes in, she can't help pantomiming it, shaking her head to make her wild curls fly everywhere. ]

[ccunningham]

[He's still shaking his head in amused disbelief as he skims over the lyrics, because this is clearly an actual thing, she wouldn't go to this level of effort of making something up

It's when she mimes along with the guitar solo that he breaks out laughing again, he can't help it] Well it's definitely catchy. [A little shake of his head managing to rein the laugh in a little] and you know my mom would still die if she heard it.

[polemical]

[ Eddie doesn't even care that Chris is clearly laughing at her, she just flips her hair off her face and grins at him back. ]

How can she be mad about this? They're singing about renouncing the Devil!

[ She knows enough about Chris's mom to know she can't be reasoned with, so she's not actually surprised. But complaining about it is fun, so here she is. ]

Just wait until later in the album. [ She leans closer, waggling her eyebrows. ] Their songs about loving Jesus are, uh. Suggestive.

[ccunningham]

[He laughs again, bright and easy, as much at Eddie's antics as the question itself] Well look at how they're dressed, for one.

[Another bark of a laugh at the follow-up statement] Oh well that's definitely off the table, you don't get suggestive about the Lord.

[polemical]

[ She keeps leaning into him, pretending it's so that she can look at the J-card in his hand and the picture of the band inside it. ] You think their hair's too big? Or is it the leather pants?

You know, my hair's pretty big. And I also own leather pants. As if your mom needs another reason to hate me.

[ Eddie's never met Chris's mom, and she's happy to keep it that way, thank you very much. Mostly because she doesn't actually like getting treated like gum on the bottom of someone's shoe, but also because she knows if it gets around that Chris is her friend, he's probably going to catch flak for it at home.

That doesn't make her get out of his space at all. ]

Well why the hell not? You know, I bet Jesus was hunky. He was a carpenter, right? I bet he was buff. I bet all the Bible ladies had the hots for him.

[ccunningham]

[It's as easy as anything to loop an arm around her waist when she's leaning that close, just to make sure she doesn't unbalance, since clearly she could use the assist with that. Any response he had to the fact of her owning leather pants was quickly forgotten in the face of what came next.]

Dee! [It's exasperated, but undeniably still amused, shaking his head] You can't just say things like that! Look, I'm not saying you're wrong, I'm just saying you don't ask questions like that, it's definitely frowned on.

[polemical]

[ Oh.

Oh. Eddie can't say she was angling to get Chris to put his arm around her, but she's also definitely not complaining. In fact, the surprise of it all has her forgetting the ridiculous bullshit that was on the tip of her tongue, but she rallies pretty quickly.

Chris thinks she's funny. She's gotta keep up the schtick. ]

Ugh, fine. [ Leaning into him any more results in her just tipping into his side, her head dropping to his shoulder as she acts all dramatic about him being such a prude about her asking the real questions. ] All I'm saying is I think you guys should focus more on Hunky Jesus and his rippling muscles. Then more people would want to come to church.

[ccunningham]

But, see, that would just be playing into lust, and if that's what gets people into church that's not for the right reasons. [He's biting back another laugh even as he says it, giving a gentle shrug, careful not to dislodge her head from where she's placed it]

And besides, we talked about it in camp once, or at least my cabin did, and carpentry isn't like being a lumberjack, like sure, there's some sawing and hammer swinging and stuff, but it's more likely that the Magdalene was interested in his finger dexterity more than anything.

[A soft snort of further suppressed laughter] We also thought it was weird that his mother is named Mary, and the one woman in his inner circle is also named Mary, but I think we decided it was just that they didn't have as many names back then.

[polemical]

Yeah, but we've already been over how the seven deadly sins are bullshit, so.

[ The fact that he doesn't seem to mind having her draped over him is making her a little bit giddy, her fading buzz feeling like it's coming right back, but then he goes and talks about finger dexterity and she has to lift her head off his shoulder to twist and stare at him with her mouth agape. Without actually pulling away, this means she has to brace herself on his thigh to not topple right over, but that's incidental at the moment. ]

Chrissy. You talked about Jesus that way? [ The idea of Chris at some kind of church camp talking about Mary Magdalene getting fingerblasted by the Son of God is hilarious. She's learning so much about him tonight! ] What would your priest say, tsk.

[ She grins, then lets herself settle back against him again, reaching for the J-card like she cares at all about the music playing right now. She just needs an excuse to let herself slump back against his side again. ] Well. Maybe Jesus had an Oedipus complex.