open post

[polemical]

open post.
you know the drill.

Comments

[yeahitsme]

we probably should, because until then, we just won't know. and that is tragic.

[polemical]

tragic and simply unacceptable.

though full disclosure if you're hoping i'll faint from shock or something you're going to be disappointed. i used to watch your swim meets and when i say the HHS swim speedos left nothing to the imagination i'm not kidding.

[yeahitsme]

I won't tell anyone you actually watched a sports before. and no they really didn't, I might as well have been swimming naked.

[polemical]

jeff thought about auditioning for the team but then he chickened out.

[ That's what it's called, right? Auditioning? ]

baby, i would have attended all of your swim meets if you swam naked.

[yeahitsme]

huh, did not know that

[it is now]

at least I can still swim naked other places

[polemical]

i think it was the practice at 4am thing as much as the walking around in your undies in front of the whole school thing. not everyone has your swagger, big boy.

i was about to say "yeah like into my heart" but that doesn't make sense.

[yeahitsme]

the early morning thing does suck, to be honest, but it was either get used to it or find a new thing, so......yeah.

maybe not but I can still try.

[polemical]

well it did great things to your shoulders and basketball did great things for your thighs, so. i SUPPOSE sports aren't all terrible wastes of time.

how about we try some other places first.

[yeahitsme]

now I want to know what you call swimming, if basketball is balls in laundry baskets.

probably a good idea.

[polemical]

i'm afraid you're going to have to work for that knowledge, steven. only the illustrious denizens of our alma mater can hear the forbidden word unassisted.

[ She doesn't have a pithy saying. Yet. ]

look at us being practical. our parents would be proud.

[ Because they both have such shitty parents. Get it? ]

[yeahitsme]

wow ok I see how it is!!

[yet.]

ha, in an alternate universe maybe, yes.

[he's pretty sure his parents would have to do math to figure out how old he is and still get it wrong]

[polemical]

i can't just hand you everything on a silver platter, baby. otherwise you'd lose interest in me.

you think i'd be wearing skirts in that universe? maybe some cute little mary-janes? think i might have graduated on my first try?

[yeahitsme]

nah I wouldn't.

I wouldn't even know where to guess on that one, because this reality might be a hot mess but it's the one that has this you in it and I like this you

[😭😭😭😭😭😭😭]

[polemical]

you say that now.

[ Give her a minute, she has to scream into her pillow. ]

steve. you gotta stop saying shit like that to me.

[yeahitsme]

whyyy. I'm not lying IT'S TRUE

[polemical]

you're ruining cool and aloof reputation.

[yeahitsme]

oops?

I mean you can still be those things though

[polemical]

not if you keep saying nice shit to me i can't!

[yeahitsme]

HOW DOES THAT WORK

i'm not gonna lie omg

[polemical]

[ She types out and deletes about five different things before just hitting send and closing her eyes. ]

you're not lying?

[yeahitsme]

all truths here. Thankfully I have left behind my days of Being An Asshole And Hanging Out With Them, so, insert cliches here about new leafs and stuff.

[polemical]

[ She was pretty sure he wasn't lying, but it's still hard to deal with when he shoves it in her face so plainly. ]

you're so fucking weird, harrington.

[yeahitsme]

yes I call it my ✨charm✨, what about it??

[polemical]

i like it. i'm also really mad at you because of it. how dare you.

[yeahitsme]

I don't know who gave me the audacity but I have it so it's too late